Free Taster Plan

Full access to our 'What to do when…' Hub (de-escalation, sibling storms, school refusal, contact days, holidays, digital risks, more).
Access to our five pearls; tools you can use to deal with tricky moments.
Access to our therapeutic AI; Pearl: Ask about your exact situation and get tailored guidance.
Access to resources you can print and use tonight.
Full access to our 'What to do when…' Hub (de-escalation, sibling storms, school refusal, contact days, holidays, digital risks, more).
Not sure where to start? Take a look at our Guided Pathways, which tells you which courses to do if you want to focus on a specific topic. For example, 'Calm the Storm' and 'Teens: Clash to Connection'.
We design the courses ourselves and add new ones every month. We're currently foster carers caring for siblings, so we understand how tough it can be. That's why our courses are short, practical and often come with resources so you can get some great routines in place tonight.

We've also got 25 years' experience designing training courses, so we know what really frustrates you when completing courses...no timer locks in our courses!

Our courses are short, which means you can complete them in one sitting. They're mobile-friendly too, so do them on the sofa, in the garden, in bed...wherever you fancy.
You'll come away from each course with a clear idea of what you can do next. Our courses are grounded in PACE. If you need something specific, just ask Pearl, our therapeutic AI.
Each of our courses tell you how they meet the UK's National Minimum Standards for Fostering Services.
We design our courses with a focus on children with more complex needs and for tricky days.

Carers and Social Workers Love Us

We have received so much training in PACE over our fostering career but this is the first course which has directly linked shame as the primary emotion driving most of our three girls’ behaviours so thank you for give such a clear, concise explanation.

SUE

I am an adopter and have been a foster carer myself and now work with foster carers. "When you go" brought back all the emotions.

This will be so useful for any child (and adult) who is saying goodbye to someone who has been part of their life.

margaret

Another great short course that opens your eyes into attachment, how things may happen and how children may behave or respond.

Natalie

Frequently Asked Questions

Do I need to enter my card details for the taster?

No. It's free. Upgrade any time by attempting to purchase a course or selecting an upgrade button. All our plans come with a 14-day money-back guarantee. That way, if you really don't think our academy is for you, drop us a message and we'll refund you.

Will I get certificates for completing the free courses?

Absolutely. No-one can take away the work you've done on yourself. Once you complete a course, you'll be prompted to download your certificate. This is great for demonstrating your Continuous Professional Development (CPD).

When you upgrade, you'll get access to a dashboard where you can track your learning. You'll also be able to download any certificate for courses you've completed in the past. Perfect for when you need to get your ducks in a row.

I'm a social worker. Can I use the taster?

You certainly can. You can also upgrade too if you wish! If you like what you see, why not tell the decision makers in your organisation about us. We've got some great packages available in our 'Pricing' tab.

Is this a replacement for professional advice?

No. We are foster carers with lived experience of caring for children. We carry out research when creating our courses to bring you a rounded view. However, as with anything to do with parenting, use your own judgement when deciding what to implement. After all, what works for one child may not work for another. Speak with your Supervising Social Worker and other professionals in your network.

Can 'Pearl', the therapeutic AI make mistakes?

Absolutely. Although Artificial Intelligence (AI) is rapidly advancing, it's still in it's infancy. Every AI can make mistakes. We've trained Pearl on therapeutic parenting techniques. She knows everything that's in our academy. We've given her access to a selection of reputable websites and she knows all about the National Minimum Standards for Fostering Services. She doesn't know who the first person was to land on the moon...because we haven't told her!

Pearl offers practical, therapeutic wording and steps. She isn't a clinician or a solicitor so don't rely on her for advice!

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Yes. Whether you pay monthly or annually, when you cancel you'll continue to have access until the end of that billing period - so either at the end of your month or year. You cancel by selecting a button in Your Profile - no need to email us.

Do you offer refunds?

We're fair. If something isn't right, contact us within 14 days of purchase and we'll give you a refund.

We operate a fair usage policy here though. For instance, if you subscribe, complete a couple of courses and realise it's not for you...fair enough. However, if you go on a study-spree and complete lots of courses within 14 days and ask for a refund...well, that's not very fair, so you won't get a refund.

What's the Household Plan exactly?

This is where you get two memberships for the price. Perhaps one for you and your partner? We're not too strict on this though as we realise that your support network may not actually live in your household. Really, you can choose anyone. Once you subscribe, you'll get immediate access. We'll reach out to you within 24 hours to ask for the name and email address of the other member. We'll then get them set up.

Do you offer deals for Local Authorities and Agencies?

Absolutely. We're not looking to replace their current training providers. Why? Because you won't find a GDPR course or other 'mandatory' training courses in our academy. Instead, we specialise in short, practical behavioural and therapeutic content that can help carers deal with more complex situations.

We offer some great deals, which can be viewed on our 'Pricing' page.

Can I gift a membership?

What a great idea! Yes. Just get in touch with us and we'll set it up for the person you choose.

Our Courses - Get access to all of them when you upgrade

Children in foster care don’t usually lie in the way adults think of lying – not with the cold calculation of a fraudster in a Netflix documentary. More often it’s a kind of survival tactic, almost automatic. Trauma specialists even talk about it as a “fourth F.” You’ve heard of fight, flight, freeze… well, lying becomes another option. Not to get one over on you, but to dodge the sting of shame, or the dread of being punished, or simply the awful feeling of being powerless.

That’s where the Curiosity Lens comes in. Imagine putting on a pair of invisible glasses or holding up a magnifying glass. Instead of seeing the fib at face value, you start to see what’s underneath it – the fear of rejection, the nervous energy, the shame the child doesn’t know how to name. With PACE in mind – curiosity and acceptance especially – you suspend the moral outrage, the urge to shout “just tell me the truth,” and you lean in gently instead.

It’s not about catching them out. It’s about keeping the conversation alive. As one parenting guide wisely put it: stay exploratory, keep wondering aloud. If you shame them, they’ll close the door. If you stay curious, they might just leave it ajar.

And when you respond with genuine interest – “I wonder what made it hard to tell me…” – you send a message that’s bigger than any single lie: I’m not here to trap you, or humiliate you. I’m here to understand you. That, over time, is how trust grows. They learn you’ll meet their honesty with compassion, not punishment. And that changes everything.

“Hmm, that’s an interesting story you’ve told me. I wonder if maybe it feels safer to say that than what really happened? If you’re worried about getting in trouble, you don’t have to be – you are safe with me. Whatever happened, we can sort it out together. Can you help me understand what’s going on?”

(This phrasing invites the child to explain, without outright accusing them of lying. It uses "I wonder" instead of "You’re lying", signalling curiosity. You might even playfully put on “magic truth glasses” with your fingers, if age-appropriate, to lighten the moment and show the child they’re not angry.)

Many children in care carry a kind of hidden script in their heads. It says: I am bad. It’s my fault. They don’t usually say it out loud, but it’s there, humming away. It comes from years of early hurt, of being rejected again and again. Some even learn that if they show real feelings – sadness, anger, longing – it might lead to punishment, or worse, abandonment. So they tuck those feelings away, and the shame festers.

This is where the Acceptance Shield comes in. It’s less superhero cape, more everyday armour. You hold it up, deliberately and consistently, to protect the child from those shame-arrows. It means making a very clear distinction: I don’t always like your behaviour, but I always accept you.

In PACE terms, it’s acceptance and empathy working in tandem. You meet the child’s feelings as they are, even the messy ones. You empathise with the shame they’re drowning in. And practically, it means tempering your own response. No harsh telling-off. No thunderous disappointment. Instead: “You’re not a bad kid. I get why this happened. And I still care about you.”

Because here’s the thing: children watch closely for whether their inner world is safe with you. If you counter their self-criticism – “I’m stupid, I’m bad” – with calm, believable truths – “You’re good, you’re worthy” – you’re teaching them a new script. One where they’re not discarded for messing up. One where they’re covered.

And when you hold that shield day after day, the child starts to believe it. Their sense of self stitches back together. They start to grow resilience against shame and rejection. And in that, the bond between you becomes their secure base – something solid, at last, in a life that’s often felt shaky.

“I know you feel really bad about this. It’s okay – we all make mistakes, but I want you to hear this: I’m not angry and I’m not leaving. I love you no matter what. Nothing will change that. Let’s figure out how to make it right together when you’re ready.”

(This script explicitly assures the child of your enduring acceptance. Phrases like “no matter what” and “nothing will change that” directly address fear of rejection. You might literally open your arms like a shield or put an arm around the child if appropriate, to physically reinforce the feeling of protection and safety.)

Defiance in children can feel like a brick wall. They cross their arms, scowl, and say “No!” with the kind of finality usually reserved for magistrates. And you feel that surge of frustration rising – the urge to push back harder. But there’s another option.

The Playful Pause is about puncturing that tense balloon with a bit of silliness. A ridiculous face. A pretend dragon lurking in the room. A mock-serious “emergency” about socks refusing to cooperate. It sounds daft, and in a way it is. But daftness is often what works.

The magic of playfulness is that it pauses the power struggle. It shifts the dynamic from “me against you” to “me with you.” For a younger child, it might be full-on theatrics. For a teenager, maybe a raised eyebrow and a wry, self-deprecating joke. Either way, it says: I’m not your enemy. We can reset this together.

It doesn’t mean ignoring the behaviour. It just means you’re smart enough to know that humour can sneak past defences that sternness never will. And once you’ve both laughed, even a little, the wall crumbles. Suddenly there’s room to carry on. Together.

In a mock-serious narrator voice: “Oh no... the Defiance Dragon has entered the room! It’s making us both all grumpy. Quick, I have an idea – I’ll make a funny face to scare it off… 😜 See, the dragon is laughing! Can you give it a try? [Child pulls a face] Hooray, we scared it away together!” (Both laugh, tension breaks) “Alright, shall we give (the task) another go now?”

In this playful script, you create a tiny imaginative game (“Defiance Dragon”) to externalise the child’s defiance as something we can team up against playfully. The exact script can vary widely by age (for a teenager, humour might be more understated, like you suddenly doing a goofy dance and saying “Ugh, what a morning – shall we hit reset and start over?” with a grin). The essence is to surprise the child out of the stuck position with levity. Your willingness to be a bit silly shows the child it’s safe to drop their guard. Once the child smiles or giggles, even briefly, the emotional climate shifts – we (you and the child) are connected again, and the task or issue can often be revisited with less resistance.

When a child withdraws – shuts the bedroom door, curls up silent on the bed – it’s tempting to take it personally. To knock loudly, or to storm off yourself. But here’s the truth: often what’s happening is less about you and more about the child drowning in feelings they can’t quite put words to. Shame, sadness, fear.

The Empathy Bridge is about reaching across that gap. Not forcing them to talk, not demanding eye contact, but sending a quiet signal: I see you. I understand. And I’m here. Maybe it’s a few calm words through the door. Maybe it’s leaving a note or a favourite snack outside. Maybe it’s just sitting nearby, available.

The visual is a bridge of hearts or hands. You stand on your side, they on theirs. And you extend something across – empathy – so when they’re ready, they can walk back over. The bridge is patient. It doesn’t collapse if they don’t use it straight away.

This says to the child: Even if you push me away, I won’t give up on you. And in time, that’s how trust is built. They learn that silence won’t scare you off. That feelings won’t break the relationship. And that you are a steady presence on the far side of the cliff, always waiting, always ready to welcome them back.

(You speak through the door or next to the withdrawn child, calmly and kindly): “I know it’s been a really upsetting day. If I were you, I might want to hide under the covers too. Just wanted to say I understand why you feel that way, and it’s alright. I’m here whenever you feel like talking or even if you just want a hug. Take your time – I’m not going anywhere.”

(In this script, you're naming and normalising the child’s likely feelings, showing empathy: “I’d feel the same if I were in your shoes.” There’s also an explicit assurance of presence: “I’m here… I’m not going anywhere,” which is crucial for a child worried about being given up on. The tone is gentle, not demanding a response. You might sit quietly nearby, or leave a soft toy or drawing materials as an invitation. The child then knows the bridge is there whenever they are ready to cross back into interaction. Even if the child doesn’t respond immediately, such messages sink in and over time the child will trust that the carer truly cares and empathises with them.)

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Understanding Childhood Trauma & ACEs

Podcast: Foster Children & Lying

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Carers and Social Workers Love Us

Course: Shame in Traumatised Children

Course: 'When You Go' - A Therapeutic Parenting Story

Course: Attachment & Children in Care

Frequently Asked Questions

Do I need to enter my card details for the taster?

Will I get certificates for completing the free courses?

I'm a social worker. Can I use the taster?

Is this a replacement for professional advice?