Shame in Traumatised Children

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  • Length: 30 minutes

Course Overview

If you're caring for a child who constantly apologises for existing, erupts in rage when they make tiny mistakes, or pushes you away whilst desperately needing connection, this course is for you.

Many traumatised children carry a devastating secret belief: "I am bad." This toxic shame drives behaviours that can leave carers feeling helpless, exhausted, and questioning their ability to help. But there is hope, and there are proven strategies that work.

In this transformative course, you'll listen to a conversation about using PACE to help deal with shame. You'll discover why shame is so different from guilt, and why traditional parenting approaches often backfire with traumatised children. Most importantly, you'll learn practical, moment-by-moment strategies for responding when shame overwhelms your child.

Parents and Carers Love Us  

We have received so much training in PACE over our fostering career but this is the first course which has directly linked shame as the primary emotion driving most of our three girls’ behaviours so thank you for give such a clear, concise explanation.
Sue

Certification Included

If you're a foster carer or other professional working with children, this certificate is a record of your Continuous Professional Development (CPD). 

CPD Minutes: 30
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How This Course Meets the UK's National Minimum Standards for Fostering Services

What's in the course?

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Recommended Reading and Resources

"Understanding the PACE Model" by bMindful Psychology

The article explains how the PACE model—Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity, Empathy—helps build trust with children who’ve experienced trauma.

It's a valuable read for parents, carers, or professionals seeking practical, compassionate tools to strengthen relationships and support emotional healing in young people through everyday interactions.

"Dyadic Developmental Practice (DDP)" by Karen Bellaby

The article explains how Dyadic Developmental Practice (DDP) supports foster and adoptive carers in building trust with children who have experienced trauma.

It introduces the PACE approach—Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity, Empathy—and addresses challenges like "blocked care." This resource is valuable for those seeking to enhance their caregiving strategies.

"Understanding and Recognizing the 
Effects of Trauma" by Children's Network Florida

The CORE Teen Right Time Booklet: Trauma 1-1 is a valuable resource for foster and adoptive parents aiming to understand and respond effectively to the effects of trauma in youth. It introduces the "Regulate, Relate, Reason" framework, guiding caregivers to support healing and build trust. This booklet is essential for those seeking practical strategies to create a trauma-informed, supportive environment for adolescents in their care.

Recourses at Beacon House

Beacon House is passionate about developing freely available resources so that knowledge about the healing of trauma and adversity is in the hands of those who need it.

Interview: "Working with Trauma-Induced Shame – with Bessel van der Kolk, MD" at the National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioural Medicine

In the interview, Bessel van der Kolk, MD gets into a parts approach for working with trauma-induced shame (and explains how shame can be adaptive).
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